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By:    On: 2012-06-26
 

Please, just laugh at this post, as it is completely satire. If any of you are really crazy enough to try any of these methods in real life... well you deserve what you get.

  1. Put on your acting hat, pick up the phone and with some sniffling, coughing and stuffed sounds call your boss and tell him how sick you are. Oh it would help if you had a cloths pin on your nose so you sound stuffed up.

     

  2. Call in dead. Go on to the computer or get a techy friend to do it, and make up a fake death certificate and print it out. I did this once for my mom who is a big western fan, so hers had John Wayne as a witness and the doctor was Doc Holiday. Then deliver it in person to your boss.

     

  3. Tell your boss your are quitting for a week but would like to be re-hired the following Monday so that you can go spend some time in the wilderness. Explain that this will help make you more productive and  a happier worker when you come back. Who knows maybe your boss will quit with you and join you on the trip. Wouldn’t that be grand?

     

  4. You could also duck tape your boss to his chair. No one would notice, I promise he seems to always be there working anyway. his family would probably give you an award to thank you for the break, as well.

     

  5. Build a robot or create a clone to take your place at work. How many people would actually notice, are you not always complaining about how boring and repeative your work is anyway?

     

  6. Are you going to catch anything while your gone? Maybe some fish or wild game. Why not try and bribe your boss with some of the loot. After all why throw out those perfectly good organs, guts and eyeballs?

     

  7. You could be honest and just ask for a few days off and use some of your earned time. But what fun is there in that.

What other ways can you think of?


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