The Jump
Posted On: 2008-09-24

One of those exceptionally good skits that is known out there but strangely is rarely ever done; always a hit. (Probably any good joke makes an exceptional skit; the key is not repeating it too often.) Cast: Reporter, Doctor, Bus driver, Pilot, Mechanic, Cook, Tax Consultant (and/or just about whoever you need -- the only constant is the Reporter.)

Setting: Cliff

Reporter: I haven't had a single story in weeks, so I'm going to commit suicide by jumping off this cliff. (Swings arms to 1,2,3) One … Two … (Suddenly,)

Doctor: Hey! What are you doing?

Reporter: I haven't had a single story in weeks, so I'm going to commit suicide by jumping off this cliff. Why are you here?

Doctor: I haven't had a patient come to visit me in weeks. And I goofed all of the operations I've filled in for. Hey! Why don't we commit suicide together?

Reporter: That sounds great. (They swing arms to 1,2,3) One … Two …

Bus Driver: Hey! What are you doing?

Reporter: I haven't had a single story in weeks, so I'm going to commit suicide by jumping off this cliff.

Doctor: I haven't had a patient come to visit me in weeks. And I goofed all of the operations I've filled in for. So we're going to commit suicide by jumping off this cliff. Why are you here?

Bus Driver: I keep on having accidents with my bus, so they fired me. Hey! Why don't we commit suicide together?

Reporter and Doctor: That sounds great. (They swing arms to 1,2,3) One ... Two ...

Pilot comes in at the same time and asks what's going on -- same thing happens, he gets asked why he's here, so he says that he keeps on crashing planes. They all are about to jump when the cook comes in, and the same thing happens, and he says that he always burns the food he cooks. They all are about to jump when the tax consultant comes in and explains, the same way the others did, that he keeps giving bad tax advice and the government is jailing his customers for tax fraud. Finally, they all are about to jump, and they do -- except for the reporter who says,

Reporter: Hey! What a story!

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