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Dummy Line


On the dummy line, on the dummy line;
Rain or shine, I'll pay my fine;
Rain or shine, I'll pay my fine;
Ride, ride, riding on the dummy line.

I got on the train and didn't have the fare,
The conductor said, "Whatcha doin' there?"
He grabbed me by the collar and shoved me out the door.
Said, "I don't want to see you on this line no more!"

Little Willy was home by himself.
Found a chocolate cake on the kitchen shelf.
Willy said, "If I eat this cake,
Sis won't get a belly ache."

Little Willy saw a mill saw buzz,
Didn't know quite what it was,
Now his arm is full of nicks,
And, alas poor Willy, he's cut in six.

Little Willy found some dynamite,
He didn't understand it quite,
But curiosity never pays,
It rained Willy several days.

Little Willy coming home from school,
Spied a half a dollar at the foot of a mule.
Stooped down to pick it up, quiet as a mouse.
Funeral tomorrow at little Willy's house!

Little birdie in the sky,
Dropped some whitewash in my eye.
Says I to me; says me to I,
"I'm sure glad that cows can't fly!"

There was a boy by the name of Jack,
Pitched his tent on a railroad track.
Midnight express came around the bend.
What kind of flowers did you send?

There once was a doctor, his name was Peck,
He fell in a well and he broke his neck.
It served him right, for he should've known;
To tend to the sick and leave the well alone!

There once was a hunter, his name was O'Hare.
He was chased by a grizzly bear.
The people all thought he was out of his mind,
Running down the street with a bear behind!

There was an old witch by the name of Nan,
Who tried to pass as a good humor man.
Couldn't fool the kids, they all stayed home
They would not buy from an ice cream crone.

My grandpa had a car, it was a Ford machine.
His whiskers came in handy for straining gasoline.
My grandma had a habit of chewing in her sleep.
She chewed on grandpa's whiskers and dreamed of shredded wheat!


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