Narrator: America's history is full of colorful characters. I'm sure you've heard of many that you couldn't even begin to count them. But we also know that much of our country's history wasn't written down until many years had passed. Memories fade as time goes by. Now…we're not calling our historians liars…but…things were not always the way they told us. Take, for instance, the burro express rider.
Rider: (enters pulling the burro) "Come on Speedy, those Cub Scouts at Southside are waiting for their Male.
Narrator: "Excuse me sir? Why do you call your burro Speedy?
Rider: Why, this here is the fastest burro in the west.
Narrator: "How fast is he?"
Rider: "Why, he's so fast he can dance his shoes off! (Burro dances, and removes his shoes and tosses them into the crowd and they leave.)
Narrator: And there's always the legend of Rip Van Winkle. It's really quite unlikely that he could sleep for forty whole years.
Rip Van W.: (entering) Sleep? Did I hear someone mention sleep. Oh, I'd love to get some sleep!
Narrator: Have a hard day Rip?
Rip Van W.: Day, day he says! Days is more like it. Ever since those Cub Scouts came to town, I haven't slept a wink. Their Den Leaders keep knocking things over and tripping over things. And you should hear them laugh.
Narrator: Poor Rip, I guess he could use forty years sleep now.
Chef: (entering eating an ice cream cone, and looking over and under and around things, saying…."Nope, not here, etc. And "I know it's around here somewhere." Continuing to look.)
Narrator: Boy that ice cream looks good. Where can I get some?
Chef: Down the road at Custard's Last Stand.
Narrator: What are you looking for?
Chef: A mine.
Narrator: You mean the Lost Dutchman Mine?
Chef: No the lost Italian Mine of course. I hear they have the greatest pizza.
Narrator: There was a guy over there who was talking about pizza earlier. I think his name was Wild Bill…..(hiccup) Wild Bill……..(hiccup)….
Chef: Yeah, I know him, Wild Bill Hiccup - Hiccup...(leave the room)